Pessimist: the glass is half empty.
Catastrophist. It will not be half full for long.
Cornucopian: We are running into water rather than out of it.
Oil executive: The more we drink, the more the water level grows.
Conspiracy Theorist: Water? What water? THEY want us to believe that there is water in the glass.
Chemtrail believer: Don't look at the water! Look up at the sky! Don't you see THEY are poisoning us?
Climate Science Denier: Scientists cannot predict the weather one week in advance, how can they say if the glass is full or empty?
Bad Pun Lover: A fish was swimming in the glass. It swam into the wall and said, "Damn!"
Thomas Malthus: You can only fill the glass at a linear rate, but people will drink from it at exponentially rising rates.
Harold Hotelling: When there will be no more water in it, we'll use beer as a backstop resource.
Robert Solow: the amount of water in the glass will keep growing exponentially.
Neoclassical Economist: when the water level will be low enough, market forces will create more.
Julian Simon: there is enough water in the glass to last for six billion years.
Colin Campbell: After you drink the water in the glass, there will be none left.
Charles Hall: the water return on energy invested (WROEI) declines as you drink it.
Gail Tverberg: Water is not really a renewable resource: you will always need fossil fuels to pump it into the glass.
Guy McPherson: All the water will have disappeared from planet Earth by 2030.
Donald Trump: We need to build a wall to keep the Mexicans from drinking our water.
Matsuo Basho: The old glass. A frog jumps into it. The noise of water.
William Shakespeare: The empty part of the glass is filled with the stuff dreams are made of.
Erwin Schroedinger: The glass is neither half full nor half empty - until you drink from it.
Jesus Christ: Have faith and walk on the stones, just like I do.
Lao Zi: A glass of a thousand gallons is filled starting with just one drop.
Buddha: The water is an illusion, just like the glass. And the drinker, too.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca: It takes a long time to fill the glass, but emptying it is rapid.
